It's kind of funny, because for the last month or so, I haven't been able to feel that gratitude. Adjustments are really hard for me, so getting used to this whole marriage thing has been a roller coaster. I've actually been praying and seeking out ways to draw closer to Isaac during this transitive time.
So I was glad this morning, when I woke up feeling a genuine gratitude and love for him. There's a few small and simple things that have come to mean the world to me.
I'm grateful for a kiss in the morning when Isaac wakes up:
The first time Isaac and I were sleeping in our apartment, he woke up before me, and gave me a kiss to tell me he was awake. Now, he does that every morning, and if he ever forgets it makes me sad. I always go back to sleep for a little while, but I love that he does that. It's an awesome way to start the day.
I love that we can go to church every Sunday:
I especially love sitting next to him and singing the hymns. There's something awesome about singing together. It always makes me a tiny bit sad that we have to split up the last hour of church for Relief Society and Priesthood. :)
I'm so glad he can hold his own:
Lots of people that know Isaac, are scared for him in this relationship because they think I'll just run him over. They think I've been running this show the whole time. What they don't realize is that Isaac can hold is own and does, often. I love that about him, and I wouldn't want it any other way. He puts me in my place better than anyone else I know, and somehow he always does it in the most loving and patient way.
I'm glad I'm learning more about marriage:
Before I got married, I didn't understand what marriage was all about. I didn't even really get why marriage was even necessary (other than the obvious added benefits ;) And I'm definitely not claiming to know all about it now, but I'm beginning to get little glimpses. Marriage is meaningful and special. It's something that says, "I'll be there for you no matter what." or "I'll try my hardest to be the person you see in me." It's giving yourself completely over to another person. For me, I think that's been the hardest part. I've never been the type of person who eagerly shares her feelings. During the past month, I've realized that it's a lot harder to hide from a person when you're around them 24/7. I've found myself beginning to open up, which is scary to me, but also pretty liberating. I'm glad Isaac is the exact type of person who can make me open up without forcing it.
Anyway, I suppose every married blog needs a nice, serious love entry every now and then. I don't plan on writing them often. So if you like that kind of thing, I guess you'll just have to read this entry over and over. Today, I was just feeling it. :)
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